Don’t worry, this is not one of those ‘life is so hard’ posts. On the contrary, it’s actually quite a positive one. 

“Life isn’t easy!”

I heard that simple statement in a podcast episode the other day, and it stuck with me. Something about it resonated. And it wasn’t just the words, but how it was said. 

I was listening to the first episode of Louise Green’s podcast Big Fit Girl which featured Meredith Atwood, a 4x Ironman Triathlete and sobriety advocate. Meredith was talking about her super impressive journey of overcoming self-doubt, becoming an endurance athlete while looking nothing like your traditional athlete and, eventually, overcoming alcohol addiction. 

“Life isn’t easy!” she said at some point in the interview. And she said it with the same kind of conviction and matter-of-factness people generally apply to saying something like 1+1=2. 

She didn’t say it in a negative way. It wasn’t about getting sympathy or making excuses. It was just a fact.

Life isn’t easy! Deal with it! 

I was sitting at the beach on a sunny day, enjoying a coffee while I listened to this interview, and I could feel something shift inside of me. I knew right away that it was important.

At first glance, it seems like a negative statement. Like a sad fact of life. But somehow, it felt like something positive to me – probably partly because of the way Meredith said it with such conviction and even excitement in a way. 

I thought about it for a while.

What if life isn’t easy? And what if that is a good thing?

What if we could simply accept that life isn’t easy and instead focus on the joy that comes with tackling challenges and experiencing growth? 

I don’t know about you, but I realised that I have this expectation that life should be easy. Every time things get hard, I get this feeling that I must have done something wrong. That I’m off-track somehow. I seem to have this fundamental belief that if I do life ‘right’, it will be easy. And so, in a way, hard times are a personal failure. I must have done something wrong – otherwise, life would be easy. 

I think most of us have good times and more challenging times in life.

I certainly do. Sometimes, everything just falls into place, and life is just awesome – and easy. Those times usually come with pride, joy and this sense of having life figured out. But they are generally followed by difficult times. When things don’t just fall into place. When something that used to feel easy and right suddenly feels hard and awkward. When I doubt and question myself and my choices. When I feel like I don’t have life figured out.

It’s probably fair to say that most people go through these phases in life. But as I was thinking about all of this, I realised something interesting. 

I seem to have this expectation that the good times will – and should – last. 

Every time things are going great for me, I feel like I’ve ‘finally’ figured life out. Like I’ve solved the puzzle. I know how to do life ‘right’ now. I feel invincible. Happy days! 

But that is always followed by disappointment. Those happy days are always followed by more challenging days. When the realisation kicks in that I don’t have life figured out after all and that the solution I thought I had wasn’t permanent after all, I feel disappointed – mostly in myself. And it’s that feeling of disappointment that usually turns hard days into hard weeks and months. It feels like that disappointment and frustration that come with having to accept that the happy days didn’t last are much more damaging than whatever caused the hard days in the first place 

But what if I would simply accept that life isn’t easy? And that it shouldn’t be? 

What if I would simply accept that happy days will be followed by harder days? 

What if I would stop trying to figure life out and finding the solution to all my problems? 

What if I would instead find joy in the challenge? 

What if I would not only accept the fact that things will get hard again, but focus on the opportunities and joy in that? 

I love all things personal growth. I love working on myself and towards something. I love learning, growing, experimenting and problem-solving.

Hard times offer plenty of opportunity for all of that!

So what if I would turn the disappointment that usually comes with realising the happy days are over into excitement and joy for the challenges and opportunities ahead? 

What if I would not only expect hard days to follow the good ones, but be excited about it? 

What if ‘having life figured out’ simply is about accepting that we’re not supposed to figure life out but instead are supposed to enjoy the ride? 

Maybe the key to a happy life is to find joy and opportunity in challenging times? 

 

I’ve been experimenting with this approach for the last couple of weeks, and it’s been amazing. Whenever I experience challenges and setbacks now, I remind myself that I expected this – in a kind, positive way. I remind myself that life isn’t easy! And I remind myself of how much I enjoy learning and growing – and that this is just another opportunity for doing just that. 

It has helped me find joy in situations that would usually be frustrating and hard. So I thought I’d share it with you in case it helps someone else :)